Peace of Mind: Part 3 - Other's Health

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Hi Christ Church.

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So I have the privilege of sitting today with Heidi

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to talk more and more, uh, about mental health

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and the significant role that it plays in our lives,

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and, uh, she comes from a professional

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mental health backdrop as well.

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Heidi, could you tell us just who you are,

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a little bit about your backdrop, um,

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and your specialty as it relates to mental health?

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I'm Heidi Wheeler, uh, officially Dr.

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Heidi Wheeler in the academic arena. Yes, yes. Gotta say it.

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I worked for it. Absolutely.

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Um, but I teach nursing at MSOE School of Nursing

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and my areas of expertise

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and, um, interests, content interests are supportive, care

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and mental health, trauma informs care

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and, um, therapeutic communication.

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How do we talk to people, well,

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how do we heal people in the world?

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But to note how our biological, physiological,

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mentally emotional, all those pieces tie together towards

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healing and restoration. Fair to say,

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And spiritual. Yeah. So mental

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illness kicks in when the stressors

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of life overtake the barriers

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and the capacity that we have to withstand those stressors.

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So stressors can be biological, they can be environmental,

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they can be a trauma, they can be a variety of things.

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And if we don't have the internal capacity

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to fight back against those stressors, then

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that's when mental illness can kick in.

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But this is what I love about Christ Incarnate,

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incarnate God, he suffered as a human so he can be with us

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and suffering because he understands.

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Yes, he knows like being in the world

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and the darkness of sinful relationships

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and pain in his body.

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He's been there and so he can relate to us. Yes,

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There's the reality of How

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Deep God enters into human experience.

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Mm-Hmm. Experience that he himself knows what it's

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to carry trauma in his own body.

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Mm-Hmm. And his own soul person.

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Don't you see so much empathy in the way he treats people?

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Our words matter and the way we, we talk to our brothers

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and sisters and about them, whether

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with we're with them or not.

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So stigma means shame.

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There's a lot of shame and stigma around mental health.

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Mm-Hmm. So if somebody has cancer, um, I think it's not

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that hard to call in and get yourself

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on the prayer list call.

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How, how can I listen to understand

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and to hear what someone's trying to say instead

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of interjecting my words?

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That's such a simple skill practice. Mm-Hmm.

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That so many people in past Mm-Hmm.

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You know, the Bible teaches us to be, you know, quick

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to listen, slow to speak, slow to get angry, slow

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To let your mouth Run.

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Maybe the simplest thing that anybody could do

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is be an active listener.

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Ooh. So

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Yeah. Okay.

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Say more. Most of us, we want

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and need to talk about our problems

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and our situations to other people.

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Mm-Hmm. If we're all doing that, then no one's listening.

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So a gift that we can give one another is,

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is active listening where we don't think

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of the next thing we're going to say,

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we're not adding exactly the same situation

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that we had five years ago.

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That's just like yours. One phrase that I teach my students

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that's never wrong is, I'm sorry.

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Because we all need to be heard and understood.

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And so offering active listening to someone

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is a way of giving them a therapy.

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It's giving them a sense of, um, safety and belonging.

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And we can do that. I mean,

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I think the church is uniquely positioned to do that.

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It is not affirming someone's behavior,

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nor is it condemning it, but it's just simply being present.

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Mm-Hmm. And available.

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Just because we're Christian does not mean

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that we don't also have to at times put up boundaries,

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you're gonna have to put up boundaries.

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Like we have to know how to do that in a loving,

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godly way, but saying no

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to some things is still Jesus did it.

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There's this concept in trauma-informed care. Yeah.

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Basically universalizing all the things we would do

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with somebody who's been through a big trauma, um,

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which is giving them choice.

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Active listening. Mm-Hmm mm-Hmm. Partnering with them.

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And if we could treat everyone in the church like they've

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had suffering in their lives,

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like they might have suffering now,

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like maybe their mental health isn't a hundred percent.

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If we could treat everyone with that empathy and care Yes.

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And listening, I think we'd all be in a better place. Yes.

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I,

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All right. Good morning. Welcome

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to Christ Church.

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Glad to have you here. Christ Church is a church about

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lifting lives, elevating Christ a church.

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For those who aren't here yet, um,

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pastor Andrew, I'm glad you're here now.

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Thanks for being here. Thanks for being part of these weeks

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and a part of these series as we're talking.

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Good morning, of course, to all of you

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who are worshiping over in East

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and the East Auditorium as well.

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Thanks for being here and being part of Christchurch

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and everybody online.

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Thanks for tuning in. Uh, as we join together.

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I was instructed this morning

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and reminded that we're, uh, supposed

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to be focused on mental health

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and this peace of Mind series, though I was exhorted

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to perhaps, uh, diverge from that specifically

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for this morning and go into Psalms

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of lament given the Packer's loss, I am not prepared

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to do that this morning.

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So I think we are gonna stick with

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what the original intent is,

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and that is to say that we've been having a conversation,

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we've been having a really meaningful conversation.

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I hope you've had a chance to be part of it.

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If you've missed any of the conversation so far,

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please note you can go back.

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I entreat you, I implore you, and I beg you to go back

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and listen to the fullness of the conversation so far.

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You can do that by going online. Go to the YouTube page.

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You can listen to the sermons always, uh, that,

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that, that we've already given.

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But we're on week three.

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We're on week three of a four week sermon series

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where we are taking a special time to address a very sacred

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and, uh, with an extra measure of sensitivity.

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A very sacred topic that is important for us

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as Christian people, for us as a church body.

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And it seems to be bubbling to the surface of awareness

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as it relates to our culture at large.

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And that is mental health and the importance

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of understanding and knowing our mental health

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and having a Christian, for those of us who do ascribe

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to the Christian tradition, a Christian framework

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as it approaches to understanding our mental health

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and the mental health of others.

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And so what we've been trying to do is develop

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what we would describe as a theology of mental health.

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Now, theology means the study of God

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or things related to our faith practice.

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And so looking at this intersection of mental health

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and our faith really is very valuable and very important.

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And unfortunately, uh, many churches have, uh, uh,

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taken to underdo this.

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They, they, they tried to do this.

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And the, the result has been, in many cases,

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some bad theology.

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And we looked at some truly destructive

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and unhelpful theology in our very first week,

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and we said that, yet you may have been experiencing this in

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other environments or in other churches

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where you have a church make comments that are unhelpful

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and deconstructive related to mental health.

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We, we, we had to peel back some of those sayings

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and some of those attitudes

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and dispositions in the very first week, last week,

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the second week we started to put in, in the place of

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that bad theology, more helpful constructs

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and a more helpful way

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of thinking about our mental health as Christian people.

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Like for example, when we think about our own health,

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we think about our, our minds in a way

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of seeing God entrusting us with our minds

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and our emotions, that they are in fact a gift

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that when God created us, he entrusts us.

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We always talk about trusting God,

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but in, in this case, we talked last week about

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how God actually trusts us to take care

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of our mental and emotional health.

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That we are stewards of our mental emotional health,

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and we need to move ourselves as best as we can towards,

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towards the fullness

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and the goodness that God originally intended

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and created for us.

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And some of us have farther

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to go than others in this regard.

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Some of us have environmental factors and,

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and things in our history

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or in our stories that make a difference in regards to this.

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But all of us are called to steward well,

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the gift of our mind and our emotions.

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This week we're gonna take a nuanced turn, just slightly

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and address not specifically our own mental health,

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but how do we navigate the reality that our mental health

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is usually unique to ourselves,

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and not everybody is in the same place that we are,

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that you yourself finds and locates yourself.

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I found myself gravitating towards Dr. Wheeler's statement.

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Isn't it incredible? These,

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these mental health professionals

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that we've had a chance to learn from?

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Um, we finished the first edit

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of the long form from the first week.

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We're gonna be releasing that this week

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and sequentially, so you'll actually get a chance to see

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and listen in video

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and in podcast format to the entirety of the conver.

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I sat for like an hour

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with these incredible intelligent persons.

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And so we wanna get that into your hands.

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We're striving to do that. But the comment

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that really stuck out to me this week

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that I found myself gravitating towards

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with Dr. Wheeler was the way that she finished saying

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that if we could treat everyone in the church

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like they've had suffering in their lives,

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if we could treat everyone in the, in, in the church, in,

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in, in the atrium, in worship,

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and even beyond the church, i I, I would,

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I would expand it right in our homes, in our places of work,

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in, in our places of recreation and play.

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If we could treat everyone that we encounter

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with the disposition and an attitude

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that acknowledges they probably have some messiness in their

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life, they're probably struggling in some way in their life.

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And what, what, what this comment

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and what the statement caused me personally to do

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is really reflect on how do I approach people?

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What is, what is my posture when, when somebody comes up

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to me or when I go up to somebody?

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What is my posture?

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What is my approach mentally

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and emotionally for myself, knowing

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that they very well could be in a different mental

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and emotional place than I am now in transparency

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as a pastor, I have to be very adept at this

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because I go in the simple atrium.

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I will be praying

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and rejoicing with someone in one situation to,

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to the significance of loss

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and difficulty and suffering in another.

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But the reality is all of us need to be equipped for this

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to acknowledge that not everyone's in the same place

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that we are.

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So how do we approach everyone

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universally in a healthy and constructive way?

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Even more than that, how do we love them?

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How do we love people

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who are gonna be potentially in a different mental

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and emotional place than we are?

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Either they might have better mental emotional health than

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we do, or perhaps worse, they might be facing some obstacles

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and difficulties in their mental and emotional health,

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but how do we love them

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when they're not in the same place that we are?

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That's a really good question and a really difficult one.

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I was talking earlier this week with some

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of the individuals, some just different people throughout

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the week and one particular individual brought out

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how much he's enjoying the series and,

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and the challenge of not always knowing when someone is

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suffering mental and emotionally.

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He talked about the reality that you know,

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when somebody is hurting physically, sometimes

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that manifests itself in an outward way

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and you can recognize it.

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You can see it like if somebody's got the full leg cast

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and they're like hobbling down with the crutches

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and the atrium or, or wherever at work

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or whatever, you're like, oh,

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something bad must have happened.

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They're probably having a hard time.

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And so you go up to them, right?

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And you're like, Hey, how you doing? How can I love you?

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How can I pray for you? How can I support you?

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Do you need a hot dish?

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You know, most of you don't know what a hot dish is.

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Do you need a Costco ready bake meal?

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That's how Christians show love.

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I dunno if you know this, it's a go-to Christian Love is a,

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is is a Costco run with a ready bake meal.

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But the idea here is we, we, we, we can

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actually often perceive

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and see when somebody is struggling in a physical way,

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not always, let's be clear, not always, but,

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but frequently that physical manifestations of pain

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and suffering, often, uh, you, you can realize

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or you can see right at at times, um, mentally, emotionally,

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it's different when a brother, a sister, a friend,

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a companion, a mom, a dad, a son

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or daughter is struggling mentally and emotionally.

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That happens within the context

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of the interior of their person.

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And it doesn't always manifest prominently on the exterior.

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Sometimes it does. But there,

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there can be a difficulty,

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especially if it's just like an acquaintance

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or somebody you don't know particularly well in, in

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how do we engage and how do we love people?

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How do we approach people knowing

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that they might actually be hurting on the inside as well?

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They might be struggling in their mind,

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in their emotions with something significant.

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This is accentuated by our cultural backdrop.

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We live in a culture where there is still a heavy measure

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of stigma around mental health.

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There is still this, this reality of, of

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boy talking about my mental

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or emotional state is very vulnerable.

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It makes us uncomfortable to, to talk about

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and to share that you're, you're struggling

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with your mind and your emotions.

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There seems to be a measure of shame

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that is often attached to it.

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And very quickly alongside of that for for,

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for others approaching you, there is frequently judgment

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that comes with it.

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This is just the, I'm not talking about the church here.

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I'm talking about the larger culture that we live in,

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hopefully in the church we're different.

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That's what we're trying to do right now is,

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is run the cultural norms that you

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and I live in on a daily basis through the Christian lens

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and filter out the gunk.

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And the reality is that there's a lot of stigma

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and there's a lot of judgment and there's a lot of shame

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that when we approach someone who has, for example,

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less mental health, uh, uh, wellness and mental

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and emotional wellness than ourselves,

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we can sometimes in our own brokenness bring to

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that conversation and bring to that person

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dispositions judgments

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that are unhelpful and unloving.

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And so we have to go through the process

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of peeling back some of those things and acknowledging

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and asking how do we actually

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desire, want to approach people who are struggling

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and suffering with their mental, emotional health?

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Worth noting the inverse is actually true as well.

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For those of us who struggle with our mental

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and emotional health, I would place myself in this category.

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I have been transparent with you all series long that I have

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as part of my narrative

347
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and part of my own personal backdrop, the reality

348
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that I have to be especially attentive to my mind

349
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and emotions, okay?

350
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Because my genetic predispositions

351
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and things like that, I go through a series

352
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of different disciplines.

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We talked about that last week.

354
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But the point is that I can't project in my less

355
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Healthy condition an assumption

356
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that the other person knows and understands.

357
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I have to be careful of that.

358
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So even if your health is less, well, you need

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to be careful on how you approach other people.

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So regardless of where you land on the health spectrum,

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we talked about the health spectrum last week.

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Regardless of where you land on that, how you approach

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and talk to people and love people matters.

364
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And it begins by acknowledging

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that not everybody's in the same place

366
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and very likely, frequently, even

367
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statistically, there's a great chance

368
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that somebody's in a different place than you are.

369
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So how do we love each other?

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This is where I'm particularly grateful to be a Christian

371
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because I in my own person

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and in my own story, I don't have a lot

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of good answers here.

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I have to go to someone who is smarter, more thoughtful,

375
00:16:45.245 --> 00:16:46.805
and more loving than myself.

376
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Thanks be to God. We got someone, his name is Jesus.

377
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Okay? So instead of asking the question of how do we,

378
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let's ask the question, how did Jesus,

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how did Jesus love people who had different degrees

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00:17:01.145 --> 00:17:04.725
of health, and he had, whether it be physical health,

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00:17:05.525 --> 00:17:08.525
spiritual health or mental health, Jesus loved everybody

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00:17:10.645 --> 00:17:12.805
recognizing that he was coming from his own place

383
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and they were in their own place.

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How did he do it? As

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I was preparing and thinking about this week,

386
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I saw all these really good stories.

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00:17:22.435 --> 00:17:25.825
There are so many rich stories about Jesus doing exactly

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this, loving people.

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Like I think about like when he, when he heals the lepers

390
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and he actually touches a leper.

391
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I mean, there, there, there's something amazing about not

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only a physical healing there,

393
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but like a mentally emotional healing that comes with some,

394
00:17:40.045 --> 00:17:42.705
the untouchable gets touched.

395
00:17:43.495 --> 00:17:45.145
Whoa, That's so good.

396
00:17:45.335 --> 00:17:47.025
Like we could talk about that, right?

397
00:17:47.485 --> 00:17:50.405
Or, or we could talk about the blind man who's never seen

398
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before and he's crying out at the, at at, at the,

399
00:17:53.185 --> 00:17:55.605
the walkway, the street, and Jesus comes along

400
00:17:55.625 --> 00:17:57.845
and engages with him and puts mud in his eyes

401
00:17:57.845 --> 00:17:59.165
and it's this whole experience.

402
00:17:59.165 --> 00:18:00.285
And then the guy can see

403
00:18:00.305 --> 00:18:02.685
and like, wow, we can talk about that, right?

404
00:18:02.985 --> 00:18:04.885
Or we could talk about another story where Jesus is

405
00:18:04.885 --> 00:18:06.485
with a woman who comes in, he's teaching

406
00:18:06.665 --> 00:18:08.485
and a woman comes in into the house

407
00:18:08.705 --> 00:18:12.125
and she dumps all this perfume on his feet and she's crying

408
00:18:12.665 --> 00:18:15.285
and she's weeping and she takes her hair

409
00:18:15.625 --> 00:18:19.365
and she washes his feet with her hair and her tears.

410
00:18:19.865 --> 00:18:21.365
Oh, I mean, I know

411
00:18:21.365 --> 00:18:23.725
that there wasn't necessarily like a physical healing in

412
00:18:23.725 --> 00:18:26.325
that example story, but is it fair to say

413
00:18:26.325 --> 00:18:29.565
that there was some mental and emotional outpouring

414
00:18:29.565 --> 00:18:30.885
and healing going on there?

415
00:18:31.165 --> 00:18:32.325
I think that's fair to say.

416
00:18:32.785 --> 00:18:36.805
We could talk about all these stories of

417
00:18:36.865 --> 00:18:39.245
how Jesus loved people, responded to people

418
00:18:39.245 --> 00:18:43.405
and approached people, but each story is unique

419
00:18:43.465 --> 00:18:44.685
and there's no one story

420
00:18:44.685 --> 00:18:47.685
that really captures the bigger picture.

421
00:18:49.475 --> 00:18:51.045
Fortunately, as I was reading

422
00:18:51.065 --> 00:18:53.285
and as I was going through things I stumbled upon

423
00:18:53.425 --> 00:18:57.045
and was reminded of a writing from a guy named Paul,

424
00:18:57.585 --> 00:19:00.205
who you might be familiar with, pastor Paul wrote much

425
00:19:00.205 --> 00:19:01.205
of the New Testament.

426
00:19:01.435 --> 00:19:04.565
He's a big time Christian, early Christian,

427
00:19:04.825 --> 00:19:07.485
and we look to Paul regularly here at Christ Church

428
00:19:07.505 --> 00:19:08.525
for insight and wisdom,

429
00:19:08.905 --> 00:19:12.165
and he wrote a book to a church just like Christ Church.

430
00:19:12.225 --> 00:19:13.525
He wrote a church book

431
00:19:14.145 --> 00:19:16.885
and one of those books found its way into our Bible.

432
00:19:17.355 --> 00:19:20.045
This letter that he wrote to the church found its way,

433
00:19:20.065 --> 00:19:21.965
and we know it as the book of Philippians.

434
00:19:22.665 --> 00:19:24.325
He wrote to the church in Philippi,

435
00:19:24.825 --> 00:19:27.205
and in this book he actually talks about

436
00:19:27.465 --> 00:19:32.245
and names Jesus's mindset, his attitude

437
00:19:33.275 --> 00:19:35.885
when it came to approaching and loving other people.

438
00:19:36.585 --> 00:19:38.685
He writes this in Philippians chapter two,

439
00:19:38.955 --> 00:19:41.325
Paul talks about write writing to a church.

440
00:19:41.345 --> 00:19:42.805
Paul's writing to a church. He says, look,

441
00:19:42.805 --> 00:19:44.245
church, don't be selfish.

442
00:19:45.455 --> 00:19:46.725
Don't try to impress others.

443
00:19:47.785 --> 00:19:51.145
Be humble thinking

444
00:19:51.145 --> 00:19:52.985
of others is better than yourselves.

445
00:19:54.245 --> 00:19:56.705
Now, I would like you to note, there's no asterisk here

446
00:19:56.705 --> 00:19:59.945
that says, think of others as better than yourselves

447
00:20:00.365 --> 00:20:02.345
unless they have worse mental health.

448
00:20:04.045 --> 00:20:06.905
It ain't there. Okay, I looked it up into Greek.

449
00:20:07.405 --> 00:20:09.665
It still ain't there, okay?

450
00:20:09.805 --> 00:20:13.345
It just says quite literally this, think

451
00:20:13.345 --> 00:20:14.505
of others as better than yourselves.

452
00:20:16.955 --> 00:20:20.825
Don't look out only for your own interests,

453
00:20:21.765 --> 00:20:22.865
but go the extra mile.

454
00:20:22.965 --> 00:20:26.065
Go the extra. We as Christian peoples don't only look out

455
00:20:26.065 --> 00:20:28.505
for our own interests, but instead take an

456
00:20:28.825 --> 00:20:29.905
interest in others too.

457
00:20:31.675 --> 00:20:36.185
Again, no asterisk, only those who will advance your career.

458
00:20:37.535 --> 00:20:41.305
Only those who love you really well in a home environment.

459
00:20:42.575 --> 00:20:45.665
Only those that that you will look at

460
00:20:45.685 --> 00:20:48.605
and say that we have an equal mental emotional capacity

461
00:20:48.625 --> 00:20:50.445
and run at the same rate and same place.

462
00:20:52.075 --> 00:20:53.085
It's not there guys,

463
00:20:57.395 --> 00:20:58.765
take an interest in others too.

464
00:21:00.245 --> 00:21:05.185
Period. You must have the same

465
00:21:06.545 --> 00:21:10.545
attitude, mindset, disposition, framework

466
00:21:12.185 --> 00:21:13.805
as Christ Jesus

467
00:21:14.905 --> 00:21:18.645
Had, And this becomes his exhortation

468
00:21:20.275 --> 00:21:24.685
have the same approach to loving others

469
00:21:26.545 --> 00:21:30.845
the way that Jesus did, the way that Jesus approaches you,

470
00:21:34.105 --> 00:21:35.995
looking not to his own interests,

471
00:21:36.015 --> 00:21:40.525
but to yours, thinking not of himself

472
00:21:40.525 --> 00:21:42.365
as being better, but in fact thinking

473
00:21:42.365 --> 00:21:44.965
of you and your wellbeing.

474
00:21:47.525 --> 00:21:50.025
In fact, the Bible actually goes on from here in

475
00:21:50.025 --> 00:21:51.825
what is often referred to as the great descent.

476
00:21:52.695 --> 00:21:53.745
This is a beautiful, it's one

477
00:21:53.745 --> 00:21:55.385
of my favorite selections of scriptures actually.

478
00:21:55.605 --> 00:21:56.985
Uh, it's in the book of Philippians

479
00:21:56.985 --> 00:21:58.265
and it directly follows this.

480
00:21:58.405 --> 00:22:01.825
We believe it to be one of the earliest, um, hymns

481
00:22:02.165 --> 00:22:03.385
for those of you like music.

482
00:22:03.595 --> 00:22:05.465
Christians have been writing music for a long time.

483
00:22:05.465 --> 00:22:06.945
This is like not a new phenomenon

484
00:22:06.945 --> 00:22:08.585
that Alexa play a Christian sound.

485
00:22:09.205 --> 00:22:11.545
You know, music playlist. Christians have been writing music

486
00:22:11.545 --> 00:22:13.185
for a long time, and in fact,

487
00:22:13.325 --> 00:22:15.865
we find various pieces in the Bible that we believe

488
00:22:15.865 --> 00:22:18.425
to be musical or be intended to write to music.

489
00:22:18.685 --> 00:22:21.905
And this is something that we believe to be one

490
00:22:21.905 --> 00:22:24.705
of the earliest Christian hymns singing

491
00:22:24.935 --> 00:22:28.105
that the church would sing of Jesus's attitude

492
00:22:28.925 --> 00:22:31.225
and what he did to display his heart

493
00:22:32.295 --> 00:22:33.595
and disposition towards people.

494
00:22:33.655 --> 00:22:37.805
It says this, you must have the same attitude

495
00:22:37.805 --> 00:22:40.765
that Christ Jesus had, though he was God.

496
00:22:41.505 --> 00:22:44.205
He did not think of equality with God

497
00:22:44.225 --> 00:22:45.365
as something to cling to.

498
00:22:46.635 --> 00:22:49.565
Instead, he gave up his divine privileges.

499
00:22:50.385 --> 00:22:52.125
He took the humble position of a slave

500
00:22:52.185 --> 00:22:53.645
and was born as a human being.

501
00:22:54.355 --> 00:22:57.685
When he appeared in human form, he humbled him himself

502
00:22:58.545 --> 00:22:59.805
in obedience to God,

503
00:23:00.105 --> 00:23:01.885
and he died a criminal's death on a cross.

504
00:23:03.235 --> 00:23:06.045
Therefore, God elevated him to the place of heist honor

505
00:23:06.985 --> 00:23:09.965
and gave him the name above all other names that at the name

506
00:23:09.965 --> 00:23:12.485
of Jesus Christ, every knee should bow in heaven

507
00:23:12.585 --> 00:23:13.765
and on earth and under the earth

508
00:23:14.465 --> 00:23:17.645
and every tongue declare that Christ Jesus is Lord

509
00:23:18.225 --> 00:23:19.645
to the glory of God the Father.

510
00:23:20.875 --> 00:23:25.565
Amen. It's known as the great descent

511
00:23:25.565 --> 00:23:27.605
because it captures the humility

512
00:23:28.955 --> 00:23:30.885
that Christ displays in his own person.

513
00:23:31.905 --> 00:23:34.845
It, it's what we refer to as the incarnation.

514
00:23:34.865 --> 00:23:36.165
That's the fancy word.

515
00:23:36.165 --> 00:23:38.845
That's the word that actually Dr. Wheeler used when you

516
00:23:38.845 --> 00:23:42.525
heard the video earlier, that that Christ

517
00:23:43.595 --> 00:23:48.165
becomes or takes on flesh, the incarnates

518
00:23:49.505 --> 00:23:52.645
in order to know, in order

519
00:23:52.705 --> 00:23:54.685
to understand the suffering

520
00:23:54.825 --> 00:23:58.845
and experience of humanity in order to come alongside

521
00:24:00.505 --> 00:24:02.315
Hurting And broken people.

522
00:24:04.875 --> 00:24:06.135
The Bible regularly, and,

523
00:24:06.135 --> 00:24:08.455
and it's just kind of in our vernacular Christian paradigm,

524
00:24:08.455 --> 00:24:11.255
that we refer to Jesus as having great compassion.

525
00:24:11.675 --> 00:24:13.535
If you go to the etymology, the word compassion,

526
00:24:13.535 --> 00:24:14.695
it's actually fascinating.

527
00:24:14.915 --> 00:24:17.015
The word passio, uh, in Latin,

528
00:24:17.075 --> 00:24:19.575
the root there is actually suffering.

529
00:24:20.885 --> 00:24:23.615
Passion. It comes from suffering.

530
00:24:24.235 --> 00:24:28.775
So compassion is to suffer with, to suffer alongside of.

531
00:24:28.915 --> 00:24:31.095
And when we describe Jesus as having compassion,

532
00:24:31.285 --> 00:24:32.655
what we are saying is that Jesus

533
00:24:33.355 --> 00:24:36.495
enters into the full human experience

534
00:24:38.355 --> 00:24:42.855
to come alongside, to bear one another's burdens

535
00:24:42.995 --> 00:24:46.535
and to suffer with his people.

536
00:24:51.645 --> 00:24:56.615
He does this because he

537
00:24:56.615 --> 00:24:58.455
thinks of others as better than himself.

538
00:24:59.595 --> 00:25:04.515
He, He thinks of you and your suffering

539
00:25:05.655 --> 00:25:08.875
and he has taken an interest in you and what you are facing,

540
00:25:10.695 --> 00:25:14.275
and he steps into our reality to draw close

541
00:25:15.175 --> 00:25:17.315
and understand and be with

542
00:25:18.055 --> 00:25:18.275
You

543
00:25:25.475 --> 00:25:26.475
In the same way.

544
00:25:29.445 --> 00:25:31.735
There's an invitation for us as Christians

545
00:25:33.695 --> 00:25:35.275
to do the same for our brothers

546
00:25:35.275 --> 00:25:36.355
and sisters beside us,

547
00:25:39.965 --> 00:25:41.655
that when we approach others,

548
00:25:43.995 --> 00:25:47.375
we come alongside them regardless of where their mental

549
00:25:47.375 --> 00:25:48.415
and emotional health is.

550
00:25:49.675 --> 00:25:51.815
We treat them as better than ourselves.

551
00:25:53.345 --> 00:25:56.405
We actually take an interest in whatever it is

552
00:25:56.405 --> 00:25:59.165
that the other person is facing,

553
00:26:01.415 --> 00:26:04.875
and we genuinely hurt alongside them

554
00:26:06.315 --> 00:26:10.965
that they might know they are not alone in what they face.

555
00:26:14.215 --> 00:26:18.565
If you are facing something this morning, you are not

556
00:26:19.415 --> 00:26:21.325
alone in what you face.

557
00:26:23.665 --> 00:26:27.445
You are. God faces it beside you

558
00:26:29.265 --> 00:26:30.525
and so does your church.

559
00:26:33.685 --> 00:26:36.105
We, we face it together.

560
00:26:38.005 --> 00:26:40.985
You are loved, you are valued,

561
00:26:43.185 --> 00:26:46.085
and the brothers and sisters of this church take a genuine

562
00:26:46.645 --> 00:26:48.325
interest in you and what you are facing

563
00:26:49.595 --> 00:26:51.655
and we seek to come alongside of you

564
00:26:52.975 --> 00:26:54.515
and to bear one another's burdens.

565
00:26:56.455 --> 00:26:58.315
You are not facing it alone.

566
00:27:03.265 --> 00:27:05.575
After the week, I just had praying with people.

567
00:27:06.735 --> 00:27:11.435
I can share with you, there is a lot of brokenness

568
00:27:11.435 --> 00:27:14.075
and hurt and pain and suffering in our church.

569
00:27:14.625 --> 00:27:15.875
It's actually one of the things I love.

570
00:27:17.165 --> 00:27:18.695
It's that we're honest about it here.

571
00:27:19.715 --> 00:27:21.165
You Don't have to be perfect.

572
00:27:21.345 --> 00:27:22.525
You don't have to have it all together

573
00:27:22.525 --> 00:27:23.605
to come to Christ Church.

574
00:27:23.945 --> 00:27:27.695
Far from we gather

575
00:27:28.885 --> 00:27:31.305
and we worship a God who is with us in it,

576
00:27:33.765 --> 00:27:35.665
and we help walk each other through it.

577
00:27:37.795 --> 00:27:41.215
Now, very practically, very tangibly the how we do that,

578
00:27:41.245 --> 00:27:42.655
this is why we have professionals,

579
00:27:43.445 --> 00:27:45.335
this is why we have Dr. Wheeler

580
00:27:45.355 --> 00:27:47.895
and others to teach us very practically

581
00:27:47.955 --> 00:27:51.775
and tangibly how we can do that, how we can exercise

582
00:27:51.845 --> 00:27:52.975
that type of a heart.

583
00:27:54.035 --> 00:27:56.535
You heard her say very simply, listening is a great example.

584
00:27:57.405 --> 00:27:59.655
Look, if you know somebody who is hurting mentally

585
00:27:59.655 --> 00:28:03.335
and emotionally, don't talk over them.

586
00:28:04.085 --> 00:28:07.855
Just listen. Listen to the pain. Listen to the grief.

587
00:28:07.855 --> 00:28:08.895
Listen to the hurt.

588
00:28:09.315 --> 00:28:11.495
Listen to the depth of difficulty that they're facing.

589
00:28:12.995 --> 00:28:15.965
Just listen, Bible teaches us be quick

590
00:28:16.105 --> 00:28:17.845
to listen, slow to speak.

591
00:28:20.225 --> 00:28:22.655
Don't try to fix it, not right away.

592
00:28:24.385 --> 00:28:25.695
Don't try to one up it.

593
00:28:27.815 --> 00:28:30.245
Don't try to bring your problems up.

594
00:28:33.215 --> 00:28:35.725
Don't talk about that time where you had

595
00:28:35.725 --> 00:28:39.925
that strange aunt out west who also faced that same thing,

596
00:28:39.985 --> 00:28:42.125
and this is how she figured it out.

597
00:28:45.215 --> 00:28:49.465
Just listen and practice empathy.

598
00:28:50.925 --> 00:28:53.225
Say, I'm sorry, that's so hard.

599
00:28:55.535 --> 00:28:57.185
Sometimes people ask me, they're like,

600
00:28:57.185 --> 00:28:59.225
why do you say I'm sorry a lot like you didn't do anything?

601
00:28:59.285 --> 00:29:00.625
And I'm like, I'm just sorry

602
00:29:01.295 --> 00:29:03.545
because you're part of this world and I am too.

603
00:29:04.965 --> 00:29:06.785
I'm sorry that you have to face what you're facing.

604
00:29:06.965 --> 00:29:08.825
I'm sorry that you have this brokenness

605
00:29:09.575 --> 00:29:11.665
because I know what that's like too and, and, and,

606
00:29:11.665 --> 00:29:13.705
and I'm just sorry that you have to face it.

607
00:29:15.635 --> 00:29:17.735
Not that I've done anything, it's just that I'm sorry

608
00:29:18.675 --> 00:29:22.335
for sin and brokenness and pain,

609
00:29:23.955 --> 00:29:26.895
and you get to do that for each other.

610
00:29:30.295 --> 00:29:34.155
You get to speak into your brother, your sister's life,

611
00:29:34.505 --> 00:29:36.835
your coworker who doesn't know Jesus.

612
00:29:37.575 --> 00:29:41.645
You. This works with non-Christians, okay?

613
00:29:43.785 --> 00:29:46.605
Listen and empathize.

614
00:29:48.515 --> 00:29:50.285
This doesn't mean that you don't have good boundaries,

615
00:29:51.365 --> 00:29:52.925
Particularly with those of us

616
00:29:52.925 --> 00:29:54.365
who struggle with mental and emotional health.

617
00:29:54.365 --> 00:29:55.485
Sometimes those of us who struggle

618
00:29:55.735 --> 00:29:57.085
don't always know the context.

619
00:29:57.305 --> 00:29:59.965
We don't always see and pick up on social cues.

620
00:30:00.075 --> 00:30:02.925
Sometimes we don't have the same awareness that

621
00:30:02.925 --> 00:30:05.405
that culture would have as normative expectations.

622
00:30:05.835 --> 00:30:08.645
Okay? That you need to have good boundaries regardless.

623
00:30:08.755 --> 00:30:12.685
Then, okay, everybody, Jesus said, no. Jesus had boundaries.

624
00:30:12.855 --> 00:30:16.485
Jesus retreated. Jesus listened. Jesus empathized.

625
00:30:16.545 --> 00:30:18.925
But then there was also a moment in time when he would

626
00:30:19.205 --> 00:30:22.285
exercise himself from exercise himself from a situation and,

627
00:30:22.285 --> 00:30:23.965
and he would put up boundaries for people.

628
00:30:24.785 --> 00:30:27.325
And so even as you engage with people, particularly

629
00:30:27.835 --> 00:30:31.405
with people who may have lesser health as it relates

630
00:30:31.405 --> 00:30:32.405
to their mind and their emotions,

631
00:30:33.285 --> 00:30:34.645
maintain your good healthy boundaries with them.

632
00:30:34.955 --> 00:30:36.765
They need that from you.

633
00:30:38.035 --> 00:30:40.885
This is how we love too, okay?

634
00:30:42.205 --> 00:30:43.575
This is how we love as well.

635
00:30:43.575 --> 00:30:46.135
This goes back to last week in self-care. Alright?

636
00:30:50.195 --> 00:30:51.935
But most of all, it goes to our hearts.

637
00:30:52.995 --> 00:30:55.725
It goes to this idea that when you engage with someone,

638
00:30:55.955 --> 00:31:00.725
when you talk to someone, love them well,

639
00:31:01.705 --> 00:31:04.805
by thinking of them as better than yourself

640
00:31:06.505 --> 00:31:10.685
and, and, and taking an interest In what they're facing

641
00:31:13.265 --> 00:31:14.925
and share with them that they're not alone.

642
00:31:16.895 --> 00:31:19.065
That you are their brother, you are their sister,

643
00:31:21.285 --> 00:31:23.185
and you are with them in it.

644
00:31:25.555 --> 00:31:28.085
That their God, the Bible describes us

645
00:31:28.145 --> 00:31:29.845
as Christian people, as ambassadors.

646
00:31:31.055 --> 00:31:34.485
Their God is with them by virtue of your

647
00:31:35.085 --> 00:31:36.445
presence in their lives.

648
00:31:41.045 --> 00:31:46.015
Everybody does have suffering in their lives,

649
00:31:47.205 --> 00:31:48.655
whether it's in their body,

650
00:31:48.805 --> 00:31:51.535
whether it's in their spirit or their mind.

651
00:31:54.765 --> 00:31:58.905
It is incumbent upon us to honor that

652
00:32:00.045 --> 00:32:01.745
and love people through

653
00:32:01.745 --> 00:32:06.465
It The same way that our God has loved

654
00:32:07.485 --> 00:32:08.485
Us.

655
00:32:10.555 --> 00:32:12.545
We're gonna pick it up again next week as we talk more

656
00:32:13.605 --> 00:32:14.705
and invite you back.

657
00:32:15.595 --> 00:32:16.985
Let's keep the conversation going

658
00:32:18.395 --> 00:32:21.575
and let's work towards loving others in the same way

659
00:32:21.575 --> 00:32:23.335
that God, Jesus Christ has loved us

660
00:32:24.005 --> 00:32:25.575
with all humility and grace.

661
00:32:27.295 --> 00:32:30.465
Amen. Uh, please pray with me. Let's pray together.

662
00:32:33.575 --> 00:32:37.085
Jesus, we come before you this morning, uh, grateful

663
00:32:37.085 --> 00:32:40.725
for a chance to be together, grateful to listen and to learn

664
00:32:40.785 --> 00:32:45.045
and to become learners of your good word

665
00:32:45.225 --> 00:32:47.365
and the disposition Jesus of your heart.

666
00:32:49.505 --> 00:32:50.725
We confess to you too often.

667
00:32:50.905 --> 00:32:53.085
We sometimes allow the stigma, the shame,

668
00:32:53.085 --> 00:32:56.165
and the judgments of culture to influence us

669
00:32:57.105 --> 00:32:58.645
and the dispositions the way in

670
00:32:58.645 --> 00:32:59.725
which we approach other people.

671
00:32:59.835 --> 00:33:03.405
Sometimes we put little asterisks on how we treat people.

672
00:33:03.505 --> 00:33:05.765
We confess that we ask

673
00:33:05.765 --> 00:33:07.445
that you would indeed just like stripping away

674
00:33:07.445 --> 00:33:09.925
that bad theology, you would strip away those bad behaviors

675
00:33:09.925 --> 00:33:12.165
and instead give us the freedom

676
00:33:13.425 --> 00:33:17.925
To Love people honestly and genuinely, freely

677
00:33:17.985 --> 00:33:20.645
and completely in the way that you have loved us.

678
00:33:22.555 --> 00:33:27.365
Help us listen well, help us exhibit empathy.

679
00:33:29.555 --> 00:33:31.205
Help us be present with people

680
00:33:35.185 --> 00:33:36.445
and in doing so, we pray

681
00:33:36.445 --> 00:33:39.165
that we would be your ambassadors helping to remind

682
00:33:39.185 --> 00:33:42.725
and embody your presence and your power and your person

683
00:33:43.225 --> 00:33:44.965
and the lives of those around us.

684
00:33:46.645 --> 00:33:47.845
I pray specifically for those

685
00:33:47.865 --> 00:33:49.005
who are struggling in their mind

686
00:33:49.005 --> 00:33:51.365
and emotions right now who might be facing grief

687
00:33:51.945 --> 00:33:54.845
or anxiety, depression, addiction.

688
00:33:54.875 --> 00:33:56.285
There's so many different things.

689
00:33:56.425 --> 00:33:58.765
God and I pray that they would know,

690
00:33:58.765 --> 00:34:01.845
they do not face the darkness alone and the struggle alone,

691
00:34:01.865 --> 00:34:04.685
but that in fact you are with them

692
00:34:04.865 --> 00:34:08.125
and that this church, your people are with them as well.

693
00:34:10.695 --> 00:34:13.885
Grant us a heart and an attitude like that of Jesus,

694
00:34:14.795 --> 00:34:15.885
your son God,

695
00:34:17.785 --> 00:34:22.045
and that in doing so, we might genuinely love

696
00:34:22.915 --> 00:34:25.285
even as we ourselves are loved

697
00:34:27.145 --> 00:34:28.365
for this and so much more.

698
00:34:28.365 --> 00:34:32.925
Jesus, we do ask and pray in your holy and precious name.

699
00:34:34.195 --> 00:34:34.485
Amen.